photography by Dawn Kingston
Its been a while since I've posted a well thought out and written blog post. the past few months have been riddled with anxiety because of Project Runway. Although it was the best time of my life it also brought a lot of stress into my life. Naturally anything in life that helps you grow is bound to make you feel uncomfortable. I was breaking my bones to fit into this mold that no longer is me so I had to grow. I outgrew that mold I feel like a new person, I feel free. What was causing me anxiety was the fact that I got cut from the show but also the fact that I was being portrayed to be a little bit of a villain and that I am not. I might be a bitch because you know any woman who knows who she is and what she wants is a bitch and I embrace that. I've come to terms with this, I am okay with how I was portrayed because if I said it I meant but I cant help but beat myself up and be like I should of just ssshhh and not said anything that wasn't nice. I literally try SO HARD to not ever speak anything negative but its the nature of the competition and I didn't realize just how bitchy some of the shit I said was but I digress. Regardless of the negativity doing Project Runway has been the highlight of my career so far. I've only been designing for three years so to get on the show with people who have been doing this for wayyyyy longer than me and compete alongside them was a huge accomplishment. If as a beginning ALMOST amateur just crossing the line as a professional designer (undeveloped designer as the haters will say) I made it to top 8 just imagine what I am going to accomplish when I am a settled DEVELOPED designer? I take everything in with a grain of salt, if I was able to get on project runway during the birth of my career, I know I am capable of so much more. I do have a lot of growing to do but to me that is life, it is about growing and learning and becoming better. I am taking everything; the positive and the negative and I am using it as fuel to fuel my life and my career. Right now I am trying to out do myself every single day. Hustling every day that goes by, sometimes I want to chill and not do anything but I have this hunger for success that never goes away therefore I take no days off. I am competing against myself I want to be better than I was before and everything I am creating I want it to be better than what I created before. I am in competition with no one BUT myself.
I'm really excited to announce that I was nominated as best sportswear/casual wear designer for the Boston Fashion Awards and I will also be showing a collection at the awards show ! You can vote for me here and buy tix to attend the awards show here :)
thanks for reading :),